How do you discipline your child? Do you smack them? Do you yell at them? Do you put them in the corner for time out? The word "discipline" actually means to teach or instruct. That should be a big hint for parents. Discipline doesn't actually have to be punishment. There is a difference.
Punishment is when you do something to your child because of bad behaviour, like smacking or grounding them. Discipline does not have to be an occurence; it would be more likely to be a lifestyle. When we want our children to behave we have certain expectations for them, right? So in order for us to get our kids to obey the rules, we need to be first be obeying them. I'm very serious here.
Think about the little things. When you are looking for a car park at the Mall and there are no parks anywhere, how do you react? Your kids are watching you. If you show patience and courtesy to other drivers your kids will be likely to do the same. This is leading your children correctly. And when you do this properly, having to discipline becomes much less likely. Do you understand what I am saying? It is of the utmost importance for parents to get things right, otherwise our children will not follow.
There are still times when we need to enforce the rules by giving out consequences to our children. It is, however, important that our kids know in advance what these consequences will be for certain behaviours. You can even write a list and stick it on the wall in the bedroom. This helps the children by letting them decide if they are willing to misbehave and take the consequence. When you can get this happening, discipline becomes much easier. The kids end up disciplining themselves. When they do something wrong they know what is coming their way.
However you choose to discipline, you need to adhere to a few basic rules: do the same thing consistently, don't back down when you have decided on a consequence, and let your children know that they are loved despite their behaviour. When you do this, your kids will begin to flourish and child discipline will become easier.
Kim Patrick is a single mother with four children, living in Queensland, Australia. She is a seminar speaker, author and parent coach, and runs an online mentoring program for parents. She is also creator of the "My Sleeping Angel" CD series, aimed at facilitating behavioural changes in children while they sleep.
Parents can obtain a copy of her best selling CD for just one dollar by signing up for parent mentoring at http://www.yourchildcanbehave.com. These CDs have given Kim national television exposure and have helped hundreds of children change their behaviour as a result.
Don't want the mentoring? Go to http://www.mysleepingangel.com/digital if you would rather buy a copy than get one for free.
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